Monochromatic days.

My Dream Yard.  Really.

My Dream Yard. Really.

The thing about winter is that it just drains the life right out of me.

I know.  Thanks to global warming, we haven’t really had a good old fashioned New England winter in years.  We’ve been lucky in terms of snowfall, I know.

But it doesn’t matter.

It isn’t the amount of snow (although with good old Nemo we have plenty of that commodity, thank you).  It isn’t the freezing rain that’s falling today or the freezing fog that is blanketing the yard.

It isn’t really about those things.

It’s about the lack of color, don’t you think?

I remember, many years ago, commuting along to work as I did every day.  Looking out ahead at the gray highway, the gray skies, the dark gray branches of the leafless trees.  I remember feeling absolutely desperate for a glimpse of something vividly blue or red or green. Something alive.  When I got to work, I dug through my cabinets until I found a big poster of a Caribbean beach and I hung it where I could see it a hundred times a day.  I yearned for the aqua shades of water and the emerald green of the plants.

It got me through to spring, and those first few precious green sprouts.

Today I am sitting in my living room. Once again a captive of the winter days.  Looking out at the gray sky, gray trees, gray fog.  The snow is sodden and heavy and colorless.  The only hues that I can make out are the dark gray/green needles of the pines and the dark gray trunks of the trees.   My brain is overwhelmed with the boring sameness of everything I see.

So what can I do?

If I were rich, I’d get on my private plane and fly myself to Barbados.  I’d pluck the blossom of a big pink plumeria and I’d gaze deep inside of it to fill myself with energy and life.

If I were rich, I’d take off right now and take myself to Sidi Bou Said, on the coast of Tunisia, where the houses are blue and white and shining in the sunlight.

If I were rich…….

What can I do, seeing that I am so completely and absolutely not rich?  I can open iPhoto, and scroll through my pictures.  I can look long and hard at this:

SONY DSCAnd this:dsc00919.jpg

And this:

SONY DSCAnd I can remind myself that time goes on, even when we wish it would slow down.  Time moves forward, in a way that we cannot stop or change or impact in any way.

Time goes on.  And before we know it, we will be seeing the color and the vibrancy of spring.

The trick is to keep believing that spring will come.  And that we will be here to see it.



18 thoughts on “Monochromatic days.

  1. I know that feeling all to well, I live in England now and I miss my home country all too much in the winter. I liked you idea of looking through lovely summer photos to get you through. I might have to give it a go at some point.


    • I hope that you find many beautiful photos to get you through! Where is your home country? (couldn’t tell on your blog…) Thanks for coming by and for commenting.
      Is England as bleak as New England in February?


      • Well, any of those would be wonderful, although I’ve never been to them. I’m partial to St. John, USVI where I’ve only been on a day trip. That’s where I’ll take you when it’s my turn to be rich.


      • Sounds great!
        I haven’t been to any of them. But I have dreamed of Barbados since I read “The Witch of Blackbird Pond” at the tender age of ten. The others just sound exotic and fabulous and like the kind of place that you’d go if you got rich.


      • I’ve been to St. Thomas a few times,( when we were better off) and St. Lucia once. I don’t recommend St. Lucia at all — the sand is salt and pepper and sticks to your feet like glue. Hot sand + feet = serious pain.


  2. I like Elyse’s comment! January feels so long and I never feel I’ll survive it. But here I am in February with the promise of March just ahead. Time is going on. I feel like I’m going to make it after all! Lovely post.

    Hope you thaw out soon.


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