Summer dilemma


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Its finally summer.  After a dark, cool, rainy spring, the weather is finally hot and humid. The woods are so thick with leaves that I can only see about ten feet when I peer in to make out what small creature is making all the ruckus in the undergrowth. The grass is lush and thick, and the gardens are thriving.  I can almost watch the pumpkin plants grow as they stretch out their long arms and embrace the soil.

After a long year of teaching, tutoring, learning new curriculum, handling student conflicts and parent worries, it is finally summer.  After hosting a bridal shower, teaching a summer drama camp, taking the dog for acupuncture and a physical and feeding friends and family, it is finally a time for a few quiet days on my own.

I woke up this morning with the empty day stretching out before me. A day when I could do pretty much anything I wanted to do.

So the first thing I did was make a list of chores to be completed.  I walked the dogs, mowed the grass and threw in a load of laundry.  I caught up with some mail and checked in with a couple of friends.

When everything was finished, I finally felt that I could open up a book or turn on bad TV.

And that made me wonder: why do I always feel like I have to “earn” my hours of free time?

Is this a leftover neurosis from my mommy days? I don’t know! But it makes me worry about what will happen to my mental health once I finally retire from teaching.  Will I become a compulsive drawer organizer when I’m faced with all that open time?  Will I start ironing my underwear and socks to make myself feel worthy of an afternoon nap? Or will I learn to embrace my inner slug and start enjoying the daily crossword puzzle?

I don’t know.  It makes me a little nervous just thinking about it!  I guess I’ll just have to wait and see how my life changes when the day comes for me to give up my daily routine.

For now, though, I’ll go fold the last load of clothes and see if I can find an episode of Long Island Medium on TV.

8 thoughts on “Summer dilemma

      • My family didn’t come much earlier (grandfather born here in 1901, grandmother born here in 1904 to immigrant parents), but it doesn’t matter. The Puritan ethos controls us from their graves. You have to read Sarah Payne Stewart’s Perfectly Miserable.

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  1. Egads! Why is making that list of chores the first thing we do? Let’s make a pact to read and watch the telly! I just watched three episodes of Parade’s End with Benedict Cumberbatch. Oh, what a British period drama! May you lazily enjoy your summer holiday when you wish!

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    • Ah, so I am not alone! What a relief!
      I just jotted down my list for tomorrow, and realized that most of it will only take about a minute to do. Maybe that’s my real plan; pretend to be productive, then slump down in exhaustion for an afternoon of trashy novels and candy!
      I must say that I don’t recognize the name of your show, but it sounds immensely more highbrow than anything I could find over here!

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      • It’s a BBC drama series so it only appears highbrow, and you can stream it via Netflix. I have some sort of amazing app (hola!) that allows me to switch countries whenever I like. I’m a US resident who enjoys watching British telly as well as subtitled titles elsewhere. Smiles!

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  2. ah–I know what you mean. Yesterday we had an unusually sweltering 93 degree day in Seattle and I kept finding chores to do. Every year, from September to June, I look forward to summer break…and then I find it takes me a good two or three weeks to actually start to relax. It must be a teacher thing; putting on the brakes is like trying to stop a freight train. I hope to reach slug mode sometime after the 4th. 🙂

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    • Ha! I love that phrasing: “putting on the brakes is like trying to stop a freight train”! Too true!
      Good luck, I hope it cools off a bit and/or I hope you find a way to relax!

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