Sometimes I wonder why I so enjoy having a stretch of time at home all alone.
I’m not really an antisocial person. I love my family. I love my husband. I love my wonderful friends.
But sometimes I love being here all by myself even more.
For the past 36+ hours, I have been in my house with just the dogs for company. Paul went hiking with a friend. The kids are in their own respective homes. I passed up a couple of social invitations.
I stayed right here.
I mowed the lawn, weeded the veggies, piled extra soil around the potatoes. I cleaned out a kitchen cabinet.
I read a stupid, mindless novel and worked on a story that I’m trying to write.
I listened to music and watched incredibly stupid TV. I read the Sunday paper.
Last night I opened a bottle of Prosecco and grilled myself a pound of wild caught salmon, with just a bit of sea salt on it. I made an unbelievably delicious cole slaw with sour cream and chive infused white wine vinegar. I ate dinner on my deck, hearing only the sound of the wind in the pines behind the house.
I went to bed early and slept for 10 straight hours. I woke up and had my iced coffee on the deck with a dog on each foot.
Why do I so enjoy my time all alone?
Here is my theory.
I think that I like being home, in the house that I have cleaned and decorated and organized, with no one to mess things up. It soothes me to look at my little nest, set up just the way I like it.
I think that I love being free to focus on doing just exactly what I feel like doing.
And most of all, I think I like it because when I am all alone, I’m not talking or listening or thinking very much. When I am here with the dogs and the grill and the mower and the compost pile, my mind shuts itself right down. I go into a sort of dormancy that allows me to restart with more energy.
I am wise enough to know that I wouldn’t like to be alone for long, or very often.
But once in a while, every once in a long while, it is an absolute gift to be here in my sunny house with only my very undemanding self as a companion. Me, and two sleepy old dogs.