Completely Transparent…..


I once had a therapist tell me that I was wasting my time with therapy.  She said that my dreams were absolutely obvious.

May I add that her name was “Goodheart”?   Not kidding, I chose her from the phone book specifically because of her name. I mean, how much more comforting could a name be than Dr. Goodheart?

Anyway, she told me that my dreams were so easy to interpret that she shouldn’t even charge me.  For example, while I was seeing her, living away from home at graduate school and very sad and lonely, I had  a dream that I was trying to walk on a long, long path, but that my shoes were too small and I couldn’t get to where I wanted to be.

Yuh.

Obvious.

When I was struggling to have a baby, and was depressed and downhearted, I once dreamed that I climbed up a huge mountain, hand over hand, until I got to the top, where I found a group of women, all sitting and breastfeeding babies.  No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t climb the last few feet to join them.

Really.

So what do you think Dr. Goodheart would make of my dreams this week?

One was a dream of my lying on my back, flat on my back, and people were piling cardboard on top of me. Tons of cardboard (this comes from the pile of cardboard in the back of my classroom, ready for our annual class play.) In my dream, there are a few people who are driving me nuts, and they are stacking piles and piles of ever more cardboard on top of me, as I try to scream out, “Ass holes!!!!  I hate you!!!”

Yeah.

"More Weight!!"

“More Weight!!”

Just like Giles Corey from the Salem Witch trials.  “Keep piling it on! I can take it!”

And then there was the dream that I was trying to keep a group of little boys safe from danger, and we were hiding in a big old house; it was thundering and pouring outside, and the boys were crying. I was trying to shelter them, and console them, but there were scary monsters outside of all of the windows.  I was scared for a bit, but then I stood up and slammed the windows shut.  So there!

I sat back down and gathered all the little boys into my arms. The dream ended with a feeling of peace.

And I keep dreaming that I’m traveling, on a long road, or on a train, or on a boat in a raging storm.   There are always problems, roadblocks, setbacks.  And I always feel scared, but I always keep going.   I keep going forward.

In my dreams, I never see where it is that I am bound, nor do I ever get there.

But there is always…..always…. the realization that I am moving forward.

What would Dr. Goodheart say to that, I wonder?

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7 thoughts on “Completely Transparent…..

  1. I would think she’d say that you are a person of courage and perseverance, and obviously a creative soul who should keep writing!

    I often have what I call “maze” dreams…where I am in a huge house or school or mall or some other big building, and I am trudging up many winding stairways and taking elevators and paths that lead to nowhere. It’s like I’m trying to find my way somewhere, but not necessarily to the exit. Sometimes I am freaked out because I realize that I was supposed to teach a class that I have forgotten about for weeks, and I’m trying to find the room. I still don’t quite know what these weird dreams say about me. :-/ 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. When things are going badly, I have dreams of being lost. I’ve had them pretty much my whole life. I wake up exhausted!
    I’m reading Jung’s Memories, Dreams, Reflections right now and enjoying it very much.

    Like

  3. Not all dreams mean something. For example, I sometimes dream that I’m in a nice, safe cave, but I find a way out through a long, ever-narrowing tunnel. When I finally burst through the tiny opening, I’m surrounded by giants and incredibly bright light.

    Try and make something mystical about that, why don’t you?
    😐

    Like

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