Here’s my highly informed, incredibly insightful theory about what is motivating the irascible bloviator who leads the polls for the Republican party. You ready?
The Donald has NO desire to become President of the United States. None. I’m not kidding.
Have you seen the President’s salary? A measly $400,000 a year. Donald probably spends more than that on hair care products!
If he were to become President, Trump would have to get up early every day and actually work. He would have to be on call 24/7, and would be expected to take phone calls in the middle of the night.
Not only that, if he became President, Trump would be put into the difficult position of having to compromise with other leaders in order to keep the country running. All evidence to the contrary notwithstanding, this is not a stupid man. He knows that Presidential power is limited. He knows that if he had the job he wouldn’t be able to just bully his way through the four years putting up walls and bombing the shit out of people.
He knows full well that it just doesn’t work that way.
So why is he marching around on the campaign trail you ask?
For the free publicity, that’s why. The man is a fame whore. He had a book coming out, he wanted to boost sales, he wanted to see his face on the news. He did not intend to actually become President! He knows its a totally thankless job!
What is my evidence for this theory, you ask? Well, I’ll tell you. When this “campaign” began, Trump sounded like himself. Bombastic, egocentric, arrogant. Yucky but not completely insane.
However, with each successive week, his comments have become more and more offensive. It began with his snarky statements about John McCain, remember? “He got captured; I prefer people who don’t get captured.” All the pundits had a nutty, and predicted that this was the “end” for Trump.
But his poll numbers rose.
Next he turned his giant mouth on Mexican immigrants. It wasn’t enough to be merely snarky now; he had to go for fully offensive. All those immigrants, rapists and drug lords being sent up here by the Mexican government. Awful! People were outraged, and some protested.
Everyone predicted the end of his campaign again….and again the numbers went up.
No matter how ugly, rude, offensive, dishonest, cruel or despicable his behavior has been, his poll numbers have gone up. What that says about our countrymen is a question that is beyond my feeble efforts at understanding.
But I truly believe, and sincerely hope, that it is driving Trump himself crazy. I can just imagine him, after promising to “bomb the shit out of” ISIS. I can see him checking the polls, and telling his wife, “This should do it. We outta be able to go on vacation by next week.” Then I can see the blood rushing to his head as he sees that he has gained even more ground.
“What the hell do I have to do to get these people to see that I can’t be President? Jesus! I’ve insulted McCain, called immigrants a bunch of rapists, made fun of women’s faces, talked about a woman having her period on national TV! I’ve threatened war! I stood up and challenged a guy to stab me in the gut! They think that’s the behavior of a world leader? Give me a break!”
“I’ve talked about building a giant wall across the continent without one word about who’d pay for it! My God, what do I have to do? I said it was OK to beat up black protestors! I even made fun of a guy with a physical disability! And STILL, they wanna vote for me? What the hell is wrong with these people?”
I can just imagine him, wagging a finger at his advisors. “This was never supposed to go this far, believe me! This was supposed to be free publicity for a couple of months, that’s it! Now do something! Get me out of this mess! I need to get to one of my private islands to recharge as soon as possible. What do I need to do to get these idiots to stop supporting me?”
I can imagine it. They’d all look at each other, helpless. Then maybe one of them would cautiously clear his throat, fidget for a moment, and say slowly. “Maybe if you pull out a gun at the next debate………..”